On "Pierrot le Fou"

"It is not really a film, it's an attempt at cinema. Life is the subject, with [Cinema]Scope and color as its attributes...In short, life filling the screen as a tap fills bathtub that is simultaneously emptying at the same rate."

~Jean-Luc Godard

"Theme"

It’s Jimmy (Pop)!
No he don’t stop
So get your shoes
It’s time to hop!
He’ll cure your blues
And make you bop
Let’s sniff some glue
With Jimmy (Pop)!
Now take a seat
And don’t be late
He’s really neat
And really great
Oh what a treat
That he’s our mate!
Jimmy (Pop)!

Cup of coffee, on a very cold day.

Goddamn. This coffee is terrible. How much did I pay for this? But now it made no difference. The deed was done, transaction final, and he was pretty sure he threw out the receipt. Making matters worse on a Tuesday afternoon, it was the middle of January. In Pittsburgh, Pa. Downtown, in the middle of a light snowfall. Some of the coldest conditions on earth contained at the tip of this miserable, triangular city. Some friends would call it a witch’s tit – the maps always shaped it that way – even though the only witch he knew, Katey, was not known for having a cold chest. Regardless, the coffee was god-awful and bore the scent of dirty rags soaked in beef stew over a butane lighter; it overpowered the cigarette smoke, rendering it down to pretty ghost dancers lasting for a few seconds before violently catching up into the rough air. And it wasn’t like his rusty, old jacket worked properly either. Nothing was good: the cigarette, the coffee, the jacket, his job, or the city. It’s all just a constant fight to stay warm. One more sip and finally, he thinks, I should get moving.

24 Feb 45

Dear Mom ---
Just rec.d the toilet set -- thanx for sending it ---
There really isnt much doing down here -- same old routine -- did I tell you that they put another cast on the leg? -- its the same type I had before -- the Doctors took the other cast off and took another X-Ray -- so I guess it isn't completely healed --- the Doc. said I'd have to wear this one for another month yet -- then they'll take another picture -- so I guess I'll just have to wait ---
I was paid last week -- and was I surprised! -- I only got thirty bucks -- and thats all I really had coming to me -- I checked it over with the paymaster and darn if he wasn't correct -- its funny tho -- I was positive I had more coming -- I also signed some paper's for my insurance -- but God only knows when I'll collect that back Money - oh well - I really dont have much coming -- just six months back Insurance -- I guess it amounts to a little over thirty-seven bucks ---
You know Mom -- I owe you an apology for the way I acted that one morning - we were talking about our "Al" -- and I flew off the handle -- remember? -- I did'nt mean too - but I dont know if you noticed it on me but I'm a little nervous -- I've been that way since I've come back -- I guess I'm a little too quick on the trigger -- you probably noticed it when "Ann" + I were talking about the Nurse's Over-Sea's -- I really blew my top that evening - but I tried not to show it - normally I dont get that hot under the collar -- but with my leg bothering me all the time plus being jittery -- I could'nt help blow off a little steam -- I hope you understand + forgive me ---
I guess what I need is a nice long rest down here -- then I'll be back to normal again --- Good nite!

Love
Son,
Louis

P.S. Hmm! - our Cigarettes have been cut down to two packs a day -- so I'll have to wait till I accumulate enough to send you -- O'Kay!

P.P.S. -- did Jim ever get those pictures

30 May 44

Dear Mom:
How are you today? -- in good health I suppose -- I feel fine too -- it's been a beautiful day today -- the Sun shining -- birds singing all around us -- it's really nice out here in the country -- the fresh air is doing me a world of good -- I feel as tho I could lick my weight in "Wild Cats" -- (ha! - am I kidding!) ---
Already we are playing Baseball -- in fact we have a league started within the company -- so far our team is doing pretty good -- the other day we play the Radio Section -- really was a tough game -- playing fourteen innings before we finally won -- the score 8 to 5 favoring us -- If you dont mind I'm going to do a little bragging -- you see I was fortunate enough to hit a "triple" with bases "loaded" -- it really made me feel good because those were the Runs we needed to win the game -- it's a shame I stumbled rounding the bases otherwise I could of strectlied it into a Homer -- I also hit a two bagger with two men on base too -- so I just could'nt help feeling chesty about it ---
We also gave the "Officers" of our Outfit a lacing -- score was 15 to 3 -- I didn't do so good -- altho I scored a few runs -- struck-out a few times too -- so that makes everything even --- funny thing tho - the English cant seem to understand our game of Baseball -- we had a few watching us play -- I imaging they think us crazy the way we yell at one another -- you see Mom over here they have their own Sport called "Cricket" -- it's a lot different also much slower than our game -- an during the contest there's no noise at' all -- they dont seem to believe in cheering -- whether a player makes a good play or a bad one -- they just applaud -- especially when a man makes a bad play -- rather than call him a Bum or throw Pop bottles -- they encourage him by applause -- a lot different than our custom ---
I imagine we do look crazy yelling at one another during the game -- jumping all over the place an calling each other Bums - + throw him out of the game -- an kill the ump -- no wonder the English think us nuts -- but we do enjoy ourselves regardless of what they think ---
I hope you dont mind my telling you about the Ball game because other wise I'd talk about girls -- and you know how monotonous that is -- by the way -- I have met some very nice English girls already -- insidently one of my favorite happens to be a cute Blonde and her name is "Pat" -- who does that reminds you of? --- Anyway I have a lot of fun going out with girls -- I like them + they like me -- so everythings even ---
I'd better stop this silly chatter right here -- I'm probably boring you to tears already ---
Hope everythings alright at home -- give Al + Jim my best -- and when I can think of something worth while to write about -- I will --- So take care -- God bless you
Your Loving Son
Louis

P.S. Did Al send the pictures yet?

26 Sept 42

Dear Mom:
Recieved Ann's letter, sorry I couldn't answer sooner. I've been on the "Firing Range" all week and my right shoulder is kinda sore from shooting.
By the way, your Son turned out to be a good "shooter". I won two medals for the "Rifle" -- Marksman and Sharpshooter. And one medal for the "Submachine gun". So if ever I have to protect myself I have very little to worry about.
On the Rifle I almost got another medal -- I missed being an "Expert" by two points. My shooting was better than most of the "Officers" in our outfit. So you see "toots"-- your Son is pretty good. (ha-ha)
Things are beginning to develope for me. I think I have a good chance in getting that clerical job. they need clerks in the office, and I think I may take it. But I'm still waiting to see if I get something better.
By the way, did Jim read the letter I sent to Ann. If he did, I hope he realiazes that it's about time he should stop making promise's.
I'm sorry to hear that Ann is having trouble with her ear again.
By the way tell her that the only reason why I bought the pin for her is because I know she is being good to her Mother, and if she continue's to be good I have another surprize for her. (a better one).
I expect to sent her the Pin by the end of this week. (Fri), also I'll try to get a studio picture of myself.
I want you to write to me and tell me if Ann is good to you, if she isn't I won't send her anything.
I'm also going to try and sent Mary and Allie something.
We are going on the Firing Range again this week, and maybe I can win some medal's.
Last week I played "Golf" at the St. Augustine Country Club with some girls rich Father. I met this girl at a U.S.O. Dance and I got to talkin to her, and the first thing you know she invited me to her home the next afternoon, where I met her father and he invited me to play "Golf" with him. It was really swell, the people down here treat us soldier's swell. The people here are mostly Rich people spending the Winter season down here. (By the way is it getting cold up there, it's "hot as heck down here.) I'll bet your thinking that I'm fallling in love "again" with this girl. Well I'm not, because her "boyfriend" in the Army also, and she expect's to to Marry him when this is all over. by the way this girl has a car just like "Uncles".
Well "Mom" I think it's about time I shut up because I'll be writing all night and I wont get any sleep.
Hoping your in the best of health and the rest of the Family.
Your best Son
Lou
P.S.
Do me a favor and let me know how long it takes my letter's to get home.
this letter was written on Saturday night the 26th it probly left here the 27th Sunday.

Daddy

I have always been scared of you, With your Luftwaffe, your gobbledygoo. And your neat mustache And your Aryan eye, bright blue. Panzer-man, panzer-man, O You-- Not God but a swastika So black no sky could squeak through. Every woman adores a Fascist, The boot in the face, the brute Brute heart of a brute like you. ... If I've killed one man, I've killed two-- The vampire who said he was you And drank my blood for a year, Seven years, if you want to know. Daddy, you can lie back now. There's a stake in your fat black heart And the villagers never liked you. They are dancing and stamping on you. They always knew it was you. Daddy, daddy, you bastard, I'm through. -Sylvia Plath

Alice

At some point in my dream I came across Alice. Standing against a wall for support in some yellow canary blouse she caught my eye. Might have been something in those bangs (I couldn't resist) or the fact that she was 6'5''. Whatever it was, in the moment I saw her I knew she was mine; I gained an uneasy confidence with understanding she was my canvas. With slow approach and easy steps I crept forward and she kept talking- nothing of substance but throwaway words, words from a smile oozing coyness, which in return made me smile, and I was right there in front of her when she stopped talking and sighed out a tiny laugh and I couldn't help but kiss her. It was a nice kiss. 'specially since I was teaching her how and there's nothing more satisfying than giving up experience. It was a short, sweet kiss and I thought it'd be smart to save more for later so I left her. I saw her again in the next room over but (you know me) I like playing games so I didn't talk to her. This is mostly weird because I have never known anyone with the name Alice.

Oscillate Wildly

A cigarette is the perfect type of a perfect pleasure. It is exquisite, and it leaves one unsatisfied. What more can one want? ~Oscar Wilde, The Picture of Dorian Gray

World's Oldest Man Dies

19 June 2009 5:05 AM, PDT

The world's oldest man has died at the age of 113.

Tomoji Tanabe passed away at his home in Miyakonojo City, southern Japan on Friday surrounded by relatives, after battling an ongoing heart problem.

The city's mayor Makoto Nagamine says, "Mr Tanabe was a symbol of Miyakonojo and cheered up many residents."

The world's oldest known person is 115 year old Gertrude Baines, who lives in Los Angeles.

I Am Tom Wolfe

Ah, the life of a wall flower. You get to hang out with the most interesting people - radio DJs, hot rodders, hippies, Hell's Angels, Wall Street tycoons, frat boys - and are completely happy putting them into the spotlight. You're completely happy hanging back with your martini and your little notebook, jotting down all your little observations, in sight but out of mind. Sure, everyone at the party knows who you are - but do they know the real you? And, more importantly, if you want to fade into the background, what's with the bright white suit?

Dear "Stuff White People Like",

• Lettuce
• Duck Tape
• Cell Phones
  
• Vegetarianism
  
• Brita Filters
• Walking on all Fours
  
• Royal Scepters
• Playing Games on Cell Phones
  
• Yelling at Ants
  
• Scrabble
• Being Annoying
• Laughing at Birds
• Masturbation
  
• Writing Postcards from Canada
• "Airplane!"
• Making Ringtones for Cellphones
• Inventing the Moon
• Camp-outs
• Contemplating navels
  

It's not hard to make fun of "white people".
Sincerely,

Thanks, Ryan.

Excerpt from "Mio Viaggio": a paper for my Italian class, as edited by my roommate.

"Prenderò uno traghetto da Napoli a Sicilia, dove miei cugini Raymond e Rosa mi incontreranno e mi concederanno abitare is mad crazy. I never thought I would get this big . But I digress. It’s all about tha endo weed and stackin money. Anyway. The bible is a good book about christians and stuch if you ever get tha chance you shoud read et. ANyway. FUCK. More beer time."

Idol

I want to do some nude modeling. I keep looking at myself naked in the mirror and I love what I see. I think it's only right to share this. I need these pictures.


Will anyone help me?

Dermatomes

WHO WANTS A HUG?

Doppelgänger

"Arzy and his colleagues suggest that the left temporoparietal junction of the brain evokes the sensation of self image—body location, position, posture etc. When the left temporoparietal junction is disturbed, the sensation of self-attribution is broken and may be replaced by the sensation of a foreign presence or copy of oneself displaced nearby. This copy mirrors the real person's body posture, location and position. Arzy and his colleagues suggest that the phenomenon they created is seen in certain mental illnesses, such as schizophrenia, particularly when accompanied by paranoia, delusions of persecution and of alien control. Nevertheless, the effects reported are highly reminiscent of the doppelgänger phenomenon. Accordingly, some reports of doppelgängers may well be due to failure of the left temporoparietal junction."

HAHA

EVERYTHING IS REAL FUCKING FUNNY WHEN YOU THINK ABOUT IT!

Personology

"Perspectives on Personality" (6th ed.) by Carver and Scheier

From Chapter 5: "Needs and Motives"

"What kinds of behavior reflect the power motive?... People high in this motive... are more sexually active than persons lower in this motive....Oliver Schultheiss and his colleagues have found that the need for power also relates to the sex hormone testosterone... There is a slight link between power needs and baseline testosterone (Schultheiss et al., 2005). More interesting, however, is what happens to testosterone after success and failure. Among men, higher need for power related to a larger increase in testosterone after a success and also to a greater reduction in testosterone after a failure. Among women, however, the associations were much more complex."

"Another motive that has emerged as a research focus is the need for intimacy... Intimacy motivation is the desire to experience warm, close, and communicative exhanges with another person, to feel close to another person. Carried to the extreme, it's the desire to merge with another person. Intimacy motivation shares with affiliation motivation a wish to be with others as an end, rather than as a means... How do people high in the intimacy motive act when they're with others? They laugh, smile, and make more eye contact when conversing than people with lower intimacy needs (McAdams, Jackson, & Kirshnit, 1984). They don't try to dominate the social scene. (People with a need for power do that.) Instead, they seem to view group activities as changes for group members to be involved in a communal way (McAdams & Powers, 1981)."

In vivo

this is a cool picture.

Fourty-Eight and Twenty

Corn-Cob Pipe - $7.25
Pipe Tobacco - $2.25/oz.
"The Handmaid's Tale" - $14.95
A pretty girl walks by - My Sanity
"Gran Torino" - $8.50
Popcorn - $5.25 (free refills)
Bus Ride - Free w/ Tuition
Bankers Rum - $10

Slow

Well what the hell, we're all the same
You got what I need, so don't play no games
Sugar think what we could do
I'll make you smile, smile, smile, smile through

Depression

Gimme gimme
gimme pills.
Please please please!
Do it for me, baby.